Wednesday, February 13, 2008

Free Dating Tip

author: Daryl Campbell
source: articlesbase.com

Since we live in an information age that is active twenty four hours a day and seven days a week, it's easy to get overwhelmed by the countless options and decisions we are confronted with on a regular basis. Nowhere is this more apparent than dating

Relationships between men and women have crossed a whole new threshold. Factor in some of the newer innovations like internet and speed dating and it becomes clear the possibilities seem almost endless. But times cannot change what many of us feel before, during and after a date. In spite of knowing the other person for quite some time, being comfortable with them in a different environment and getting an enthusiastic yes when you ask them for a date, it still does not stop your nerves from giving you plenty of grief.

A big part of being nervous is of course you want the date to go right. Carefully planning a date and then watching it fall apart before your eyes is a nightmare we all dread. No question if you have ever experienced this, there is a little voice of doubt saying, "Here we go again." Another reason however is confidence. You may not have experienced a bad date or this may even be your first date but you still feel shaky. For some reason it always seems like the equivalent of having to do a public speaking engagement in front of a tough audience.

It is not to that extreme but it can feel like you are auditioning and in a way you are. You are selling the product known as you and hope the prospective buyer (your date) like what they see and hear. If they so no then you are faced with rejection which no matter how you look at it can be very painful. All of us want to be wanted. It is easy to understand why anyone who has ever been rejected would be reluctant to try again. No is a simple word that packs a terrific punch that can shake anyone to the core.

So what's the alternative? Not to date anyone and in the long run that's far worst. Never giving a relationship a chance because your nerves just could not stand anything nonconstructive can do more damage than experiencing rejection. Does rejection hurt? Yes but it doesn't mean that your world will come to an end. Just keep in mind that if they reject you then it is their loss.

Your date is not on a pedestal. While you definitely want your date to accept you there is no reason to beg for it. It is all about give and take and realizing both of you are on the same level. Be confident in what you have to offer the other person. If they accept, then that is something to build on, if not then wish them well and keep looking for the person that is more in tune to your frequency; they do exist.

Accept the fact that a certain amount of nervousness is going to exist and in some ways can keep you focused on the task at hand. But do everything in your power to make sure it does not take center stage. Relax and expect that you and your date will have a good time. With that mindset you will.

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Monday, February 4, 2008

Porn Proof Your Relationship

by Mishaun Taylor
via articlesbase.com

Porn can be a really sticky issue in a relationship. If you are afraid that your interest or your spouse's interest in porn could possibly turn into an addiction or cause other problems in your relationship, there are things you can do that might help. Here are some great tips to porn proof your relationship:

1. Don't stop trying - One thing that can cause a relationship to grow distant and lead to porn problems is that the couple stops trying. If you remember the way your relationship was when you first married or first started dating, you probably remember that you did a lot of things to impress your spouse. As time progresses, we stop doing things like this because we become secure and comfortable within the relationship. When you continue to do these things for your spouse, things will stay more interesting and there will be less temptation to turn to porn.

2. Don't be afraid to experiment - While you should certainly never do something that is going to make you feel uncomfortable, you shouldn't be afraid to experiment with your sexuality. Trying new things and tossing things up a bit from time to time can be a real turn-on for both of you and will keep things interesting in your relationship. You can explore each other's fantasies (within reason), you can role play and many other things that will keep both of you interested in each other and not a picture of something.

3. Spend time together - Try to spend time with your spouse regularly, as this strengthens bonds and keeps you closer together. In fact, every once in a while you should take a mini vacation or a romantic weekend away. Very often, with the busy lives that we lead today, it can be easy to become distanced from your spouse. Taking time away to just enjoy each other can stop the temptation to turn to other things, such as porn.

4. Initiate more often - If you are never the one to initiate sex within your relationship, you should most definitely do so. Your spouse may feel that you don't find them attractive if you never act as though you want to be intimate with them. When you show you are attracted to them and that you want to be intimate with them, it is a real turn-on and that will keep your spouse from turning to porn.

5. Compliment your spouse - Many people turn to porn because they are seeking gratification and may feel insecure. If you make sure to compliment your spouse often, it will alleviate a lot of their insecurities. This will let them know that you find them attractive and they will feel less compelled to check out porn. When they have someone at home who finds them incredibly sexy, they will not have the need to indulge in fantasies online or in a magazine.

Following these tips can help you prevent porn from coming into your relationship. When you take time to care for your relationship, you can make sure things like this don't become a concern in your life or in your marriage

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